Keeping My Commitment


"Sister Of Mercy, Angel Of Death"

16" X 20"

Acrylic on Canvas

I awoke this morning and went about my usual routine. Turning on the coffee pot, getting my first critical cup of joe after it was done and taking a seat on our couch to sip the life-giving elixir by the glow of predawn candlelight. Then my husband came down, settled onto the couch with his coffee but halfway through my second cup, he turned on the t.v.

He usually goes straight for the weather or the new. Today it was the news. First thing to light up the screen was "Breaking News". The horrific shooting at a Las Vegas music festival that killed over 50 people. He proceeded to watch as they showed the actual video of the killer opening fire while I covered my eyes. Hearing it was bad enough and my husband's comments regarding what was happening was too much. I retreated to the deck with my coffee to sit by myself on the verge of tears. Even now, much later in the day, I am still in shock at what happened and am finding it difficult to keep my emotions in check. I don't know why I am ultra sensitive these days to all of the tragedies we have been bombarded with recently.

I even considered not writing my blog post today feeling too affected by this morning's news and thinking I really didn't have anything to say that would pertain to my art and why you all read this blog. But I reminded myself that I had made a commitment to write this blog every Monday and so here I am.

I also realize that in times of tragedy or in the face of something we find horrific, art and art making can be an outlet and a way of processing our emotions. Many great love songs are written because of the pain of a broken heart. Many great artists struggled with depression and used their painting process as a way to cope. Frida Kahlo created her unique works while dealing with a life filled with severe medical issues, a miscarriage and an unfaithful husband.

Although I did not create any art today in response to what happened in Las Vegas or to help me process it, I am finding the act of writing today's blog and staying true to my commitment is helping me to grieve but also to keep moving forward. We all have to keep moving forward.

My prayers are being sent upward for those who were killed in this tragedy, their families and all the rest of us whos' hearts are broken by this newest horrific event.

Peace and Love.

~Beth~


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